It would be remiss of me not to note that the pole-dancing class mentioned only a couple of stories further down this page was reviewed in Saturday's Guardian Guide. Described as 'now an accepted form of alternative fitness, guaranteed to improve upper-body strength and muscle tone,' the story nevertheless notes that 'in evidence [are] bare legs - due mainly to the fact that the required pole adherence is never going to happen in tights or denim.'
Right, thanks, that's fine. Far more than I need to know.
I’m really worried by how much this is freaking you out. Have you suffered some kind of pole dance trauma in the distant past?